Perseverance

I used to hate that word! I used to hear it and the hair on the back of my neck would bristle! I don't exactly know why I felt that way, I just did... I've just gotten off of the phone with Tina and am reflecting on what I was just sharing with her... and I'm realizing all of a sudden that this is what I was talking about; perseverance.

I was sharing that I had been going through a very difficul time personally, and that I felt like all of a sudden the clouds had parted and I was able to breathe again. I don't know what made it change, maybe it was going away and being removed from my everyday routine long enough to cause change to occur. I think it probably has alot to do with Lorna's Spiritual Direction class at SSU... three hours every other day of directed retreat - what a gift! Now, as I reflect on the last few weeks, it seems like I can see again and hope again and have vision again. During this time I could barely communicate about anything other than my need, my exhaustion. Even in my prayer time it was all about me, me, me... now I find myself being able to hear again, not just rant and rave but listen to the voice that brings me life! Because of this I'm able to give again! I guess I feel like I've tasted a bit of resurrection and its given me a thirst for more! I'm feeling hungry and thirsty again; a hunger and thirst that come not out of being parched but out of having discovered something so good that I just want more of it! I'm rediscovering my passion and my joy! Best of all I'm hearing again... I'm able to be quiet again... I'm so humbled and blessed... I am so very very thankful! I feel like I'm found again!